Meet the Riddles
by savory pie
Summary: Tom and Luna have three children. Luna tries to keep a sense of normalcy, but often it is a most difficult task in their chaotic home.
1. Euphemia

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter.

**Warning: **Insanity and ridiculousness ahead!

**A/N: **TopazDragon requested that I post the chaotic AU my friend and I made up in which Tom and Luna have three children. But before you can meet the family as a whole, you should become acquainted with the kids. :)

The youngest is Euphemia, Euphie, for short, named after her great grandmother. She is a little Luna, but calculating like her dad, getting away with things because who would think that dotty Euphie would do such a thing? Her father eventually finds out and is secretly proud of Euphie, but does not want to disrupt his wife's idea that she has one good child.

* * *

Euphemia

It was the first day of school. Not that it concerned Euphie too much. She, only eight and a half, had no worries at the prospect of starting school for a while. Her brothers in contrast, scrambled to pack their trunks and organize their supplies. Today, the younger of her brothers would start his first year at Hogwarts. The elder would start his fourth year.

Euphemia yawned and got up out of bed. She brushed her growing blonde hair and sauntered downstairs in her pajamas. She pondered ideas for the last breakfast with her bothersome siblings and decided on bacon, scrambled eggs, and pancakes. Over the summer, Euphie's mother had taught her to cook and she decided to do something nice for her brothers considering…

A (somewhat) masculine shriek pierced the early morning in the Riddle home. Euphie acknowledged that Tommy had received his parting gift. Leeches are such misunderstood creatures, she thought as she turned on the stove. As planned, right when the clocks turned 7:00 am, the walls of the house were covered with the contents of Marv's diary.

Euphie smiled. She couldn't _wait_ until she started school. The opportunities were endless…for learning, of course.


	2. Thomas Jr

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter.

**Warning: **Insanity and ridiculousness ahead!

**A/N: **I introduce Thomas Jr., the middle child, otherwise known as Tom Jr. or Tommy thus not to be confused with his father. He is a mix of Luna and Tom and unfortunately, those don't mix well. He's brilliant, but it doesn't show since he is easily distracted and has no impulse control. He feels like he's always in the shadow of his older brother, Marvolo.

* * *

Thomas Jr.

"What's the matter?"

Luna wrapped her arms gently around her husband's neck. She felt his back tense when she rested her head in the crook of his neck.

"I got a letter from the school." He replied, quickly tossing it across the dinner table before Luna had a chance to read it.

"What for?"

Tom sighed and a short stretch of silence followed in which he pondered how to word the news. His wife suspected the news to be unpleasant. Tom always felt the need to sugarcoat bad news about their children.

"Just tell me." Luna requested quietly.

"I received a report that Thomas was bullying other students." He said, a troubled expression on his face.

"That's terrible!"

"Yes. I can't believe he got caught."


	3. Marvolo

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Harry Potter.

**A/N:** Marvolo, Marv for short, the oldest, is a miniature Tom—smart, handsome…and a bit of a drama queen.

**Warning: **Insanity and ridiculousness ahead!

* * *

Marvolo

"They're here on vacation."

"That doesn't mean I can't teach them, teach them _real _magic that the foolish professors at Hogwarts refuse to teach." Luna swatted at her husband's theatric hand gestures.

"Hogwarts has them in the school year. You have them in the summer. Let them have _some_ peace during winter break, please—"

"Get back here you little monster!" Marvolo shouted. Tom and Luna heard violent feet above their heads come closer.

"Marv likes Rose~!" Tom Jr. yelled in a singsong manner while running down the stairs, waving a picture in one hand.

"Rose?" Luna turned curious eyes towards the stairs where her sons were chasing each other. "Rose Weasley?"

Her question went ignored, however, for her youngest son began singing, "Marv and Rose, sitting in a tree-"

"Shut up! _Shut up!_" Marvolo screeched, his posture poised to reach out and smack his brother into silence if necessary.

"K-I-S-S-I-" Marvolo launched himself at his brother, successfully putting an end to the taunting. Together they fell into a heap at the foot of the stairs and Luna decided it was high time to intervene before they killed each other in a fit of rage.

"Now, now, let's not injure each other." Luna coaxed, pulling her sons apart. Unfortunately, Marvolo refused to let go of his brother.

"Give that back!"

"I don't have it!" The older boy got off of the younger, allowing him to sit up. Tom Jr. raised his hands up and the photo was nowhere on him.

"What did you do with it you weasel?"

"Me? I didn't do anything!" Tom Jr. growled back defensively. He pointed accusingly toward their sister Euphemia who sat calmly at the edge of the stair rail, legs swinging freely. In her hand she held the photo in question: a blurred snapshot of the Weasley girl, who seemed to be nose-deep in her Arithmancy textbook.

Euphie smirked, which made her look remarkably similar to her father, and waved the picture like bait, "Looking for something?"

Euphie's smirk immediately faded as she realized the photograph was no longer in her fingers. She looked up to see her father standing right behind her, carefully examining the image. He then let it fall out of his hand and float to the floor below. Marvolo immediately grabbed it as soon as it was within his arm's reach.

"Is that the cause of pandemonium? A picture?" He asked calmly, but his children knew to tread lightly.

"We didn't mean to disturb you father." Marvolo apologized.

Tom studied his eldest son through narrow eyes, delighting in the way Marvolo squirmed uncomfortably under his gaze.

"This Weasley girl…isn't she a half-blood?"

"Yes sir." Marvolo avoided his father's gaze and could still feel his eyes burning holes into him.

"What a shame. She's a pretty girl."

"Oh, Tom, stop it." Luna said, suddenly appearing beside her husband. She had her arms crossed, but nevertheless a tranquil air about her. "Stop filling their heads with blood supremacist ideals. My pureblood status never saved me from pushes in the hallways and name-calling. I really don't see what the big deal is." She said in her wistful voice. "You're a half-blood, aren't you?" She added as an afterthought.

Tom frowned and shifted his gaze uncomfortably.

Euphie gasped.

Tom Jr. gaped.

And Marvolo broke the silence.

"MY LIFE IS A LIE."

* * *

"Son, I think it would be best if you focused on your grades instead of getting yourself a girlfriend."

"Yeah, well I think it would be better if I were a pureblood, BUT I'M NOT."


End file.
